Monday, February 6, 2012

Yes, I actually am in a catch 22...no, really, I am...

and I want my family to see that.  I function too well to be able to get myself on any kind of funding.  I can make a budget and stick to it, I can write a check, I can buy groceries, I know how to read a bus schedule and actually understand it.  I don't believe that I need funding as badly as this woman does, and I am definitely not as autistic as this man.  The only thing I still need to be able to live indepently is an income that's enough to support myself with.  I will never be able to get myself on disability, so I need for my family to stop trying to talk me into applying again, so I can concentrate on getting myself what I need; a life.  What makes me really angry and resentful about this is that the people closest to me are determinedly "Pollyanna" about all this.  They just assume that I will be able to get it.  Except for one problem: if I could get disability, I would be on it by now.  Not only that, there would be other aspies who are also on disability.  I don't know of anyone, diagnosed with Asperger's, who are on disability or ssi.  And believe me, I've looked.  I've looked to the point where I have to conclude that these people, who have AS and actually have funding, have faded into the wallpaper, or become invisible.  Or moved somewhere, and dropped off the map.

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